Blog to discuss the book "The Apocalypse - Letter by Letter: A Literary Analysis of the Book of Revelation" and current events that point to the events described therein.
Note: Steven Paul's sister, Nancy had written to him lamenting a "wasted life" that now culminated in her being severely disabled and living alone in a mobile home park. His reply to her is below. This letter gives a little more insight into the mind and heart of Steven Paul.
Friday March 29, 2000
Hi Nancy,
I am responding to express my gratitude to your letter dated 3/24/00, in the first reason to express my gratitude for your thoughtfulness, and in second reason to clarify some matters to you. The latter reason makes the most part of this letter.
You wrote: "At 50, it's sad, I still don't know what my purpose in life is - I just keep asking God to show me BUT with neon signs! [Our sister] says the same thing!"
You silly sister of mine, must I point out to you (and our sister) what you already know? Begin with the question of what is the purpose most fundamental to any individual, and the answer is obvious: to change from a soul doing its own will [selfish love] to one that does the will of God [unselfish love]. St. John clearly and plainly stated that "God is love." Intellectually, reason makes us the likeness of the Creator. Volitionally, love makes us the likeness of Him. God, who is omniscient, is much more interested in the works of your heart than of your head. Remember what St. Paul said about the way greater than all others: "Thee abide faith, hope, and love, but the greatest of these is love." [Corinthians, Ch. 13] Christ on the cross is not a sign of intellectual work, but the sign of the greatest act of love, a volitional work of obedience.
Stop such silliness of questioning right now! And [sister] too! Your "purpose" is presented to you every day in many times and places. Don't judge merely by external things, but by the response of the heart or will. Works of love move around the world immediately, for love is spiritual and in the mystical body of Christ. Do you know who the patron saint of missionaries is? St. Therese of Lisieux, the Little Flower, who never left her convent. Though you live in a small mobile home, Nancy, your spirit can affect someone in India or right next door. Distance is irrelevant, for nothing travels faster than spirit. Your purpose in life is to perform acts of love. Some people work and earn a paycheck, then give money to help others. Some sit in their wheelchair and say the Rosary and pray for the souls in purgatory. Some write books for the instruction of others, as did the philosopher - theologian St. Thomas Aquinas. Some are mothers and fathers. I think you get the point.
The way of the cross, i.e., the way of suffering, is the hardest of all. God chooses the way of suffering more for some souls than for others. Physical and mental agony test and prove beyond what words can describe. I am not talking about hardships, such as a man's working two jobs to support his family. No, no, no, I am talking about suffering, suffering which seemingly reduces a rational human to I do not know what. Even Christ prayed: "Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from me. But not my will, but thine, be done."
Suffering is a horror, and only great grace from God enables the individual to endure it without turning away from God. We are very, very fragile and weak creatures, Nance, and very few of us can endure more than a little suffering. Ask yourself: can one work 80 hours a week, having good health, and be joyful? Yes. Can one lie in agony on a hospital bed, in great pain, and also be joyful? Only by God's greatest graces. Aye, I understand your fear that you won't be able to take care of yourself, and [our brother-in-law]'s fear of spending years in a nursing home. If something is external to you and beyond your control, then so be it. The thing is that you never know what life will bring to you. God got you out of one mess; perhaps He will do so again. Sufficient for today is the evil thereof. You might remain in your mobile home till age 60, then die in your sleep. Who knows?
Forget your past stupidity: those days are gone. Enjoy what you have been given since then. Pray [your brothers] change too. There is good in them, and prayer may reap good fruit long after the prayer. Do you know they admire you for your cheerfulness in spite of many hardships? We don't care whether you are Einstein, for we know you would give your last dollar to help us. You are the lesson that heart is worth infinitely more than head. Study that for a while.
Well, you expect in feline felicity x4, go easy.
Steve
Note: Nancy took Steve's advice and proceeded to minister to other's in the mobile home park. Across the street lived twins, Joan and Joyce. They had never separated or married and were in their 60's. Both were alcoholic. When Joan died of cancer, Joyce was left alone like a child. Nancy told her God loved her and brought her to church for the first time since she was a child. There the priest put his hands on Joyce's head and she felt she was saved. She received the sacraments and when she became terminally ill from years of drinking, she died in peace and grace. Nancy would die a couple of years later after a long painful life of suffering from Rheumatoid arthritis. But she helped many people find a closer relationship to Christ through His mother and the sacraments.
